THE REALITY
Days are jam-packed, and kids are busy. They have school assignments, household chores, seasonal or holiday-related commitments, play time with friends and family, the lure of the outdoors, sports activities, extracurricular interest clubs, and more. Plus, kids need downtime to read and unwind. They can feel pressure to get things done. Some plow their way through. However, many kids just stop and slam on the brakes (which is like sitting in one place with wheels spinning but going nowhere). Other kids get confused, frustrated, upset, or confrontational. Emotions can run high.
The truth is that no one is born knowing how to juggle time, feelings, or slates of activities. When confronted with demands, kids can become overwhelmed. It helps if they pause and consider the circumstances—and how to manage or mitigate them.
SUGGESTIONS
Fortunately, people of all ages have the capacity to adjust their ways of thinking and behaving, and to learn how to set reasonable paths forward. Here are several suggestions to share with kids so they can feel more at ease and deal with whatever might be overwhelming them. Although situations may different, consider the following:
- Pacing. Focus on one thing at a time. Advance slowly, steadily, and comfortably. There’s an old proverb: “Every journey starts with one small step.” Once you take it, congratulate yourself, and take another!
- Composure. A framework for action starts with getting calm. Try not to let worry, guilt, anger, or other emotions interfere. Take a break. Breathe deeply. Hug a teddy. Go for a nature walk. Connect with a trusted family member or friend, Be positive!
- Identifying the emotion. Coming to terms with feelings (understanding and effectively addressing them) involves knowing what those feelings are. Naming emotions is a helpful strategy.
- Prioritizing. Figure out what’s urgent. What can wait? What expectations are fair (or not)? What’s really required? How much time, energy, willpower, and assistance are you likely to need to tackle it—or some of it?
- Sharing the load. A collaborative approach can lighten burdens, help forge relationships, broaden viewpoints, strengthen decision-making efforts, lessen risks, and increase motivation and fun!
- Information-gathering. Pull together what you need. Who can offer reassurance or guidance? (Perhaps parents, grandparents, teachers, or counsellors.) Time spent acquiring assistance, current and dependable information, and helpful resources or equipment, is time well spent. Preparedness is motivating.
- Reflection! It makes good sense to be reflective. It can help when clarifying and consolidating ideas, next steps, and goals, and when exploring options, attitudes, and assumptions. Plus, thinking about successful outcomes can be inspiring!
LAST WORDS
Being overwhelmed but NOT pushing forward is like being at a stand-still. Realistically, a stalled person (like a car) can’t sit still forever. They must get moving sooner or later, so it might as well be sooner! Parents and kids can consider trying the above-mentioned strategies. For further information on these, check out my website (www.joannefoster.ca) for blogs and articles on such topics as: Flexible Pacing; Positive Perspectives; Name That Emotion; Collaboration; Helping Kids Embrace Reflection; and more.
If overwhelmed, remember to give yourself breaks (and pats on the back) as you proceed. Most importantly, have confidence in yourself!
AUTHOR’S NOTE
In my new picture book, GRUMBLESOME, a little boy named Nat is overwhelmed by feelings after a video-game-related bedtime quarrel with his parents. Rhyming verses convey his experiences as the story unfolds. And, the pictures (by NY Tiimes #1 bestselling illustrator Brandon Dorman), vividly depict Nat’s feelings and actions. Readers follow Nat’s emotional journey. (And, yes, he uses some of the above-noted strategies!)
